I was going to update earlier this week but I have been in the ultimate funk. I do not know why but I just keep getting really sad. I know my FB friends and twitter followers are tired of my teenage girl like angst.
I saw something today that I really really needed to see/read.
I know you are thinking why did this help you? I guess because sometimes I still do not think my life is where I am suppose to be. I honestly try so so hard to keep a huge smile on my face and say everything is fine because that is what is expected of me.....I think.
Well let me tell you where I thought my life would be..... I would be in New York City living this wonderful Sex&The City Life. I would have this amazing PR job and paint the town, in the city that never sleeps, with my closest girlfriends.....
NEWSFLASH: Unrealistic Expectations get you no where.
Let me just clarify something... I am in an awesome city. I have a very well paying job and work hard every day because I know that I'm building experience for my future. Just sometimes it is super hard to be in a new city without my amazing friends and family. Yes I realize I am 23 and should be able to handle the world on my own. But we all need comfort and support at times. I just feel like I've failed myself and I do not know who I am anymore.
I am trying the accept that I have my whole life ahead of me and I will reach my dreams one day. It could be a month from now or 10 years from now.... it will happen. I just can never give up.
I even started feeling like I was failing at my diet because I hit another plateau. Then I realized there are few things I have control over and this is something I hold the key to. So now my life revolves around bettering myself. I am going to work super hard at my diet and work. I may stay home on the weekends and no fun plans but at least I will be healthy :)
Yes, I'm lonely but at least long days at the office and eating right/working out will fill in for right now.
I have something to bring my spirits up... I get to visit my college friends labor day weekend! I am just thrilled! I know it will be just what the doctor ordered! Football, friends, and reliving my glory days in college.
Sorry for the Debbie Downer post. I just really needed to do some venting. I am usually a very positive person so forgive me for this post. :)