Monday, September 19, 2011

Having an off day....

Not having a good day I guess you can say...

I am constantly upset and feel like I could cry any second of the day. I randomly start tearing up just thinking about how my life has not turned out the way I wanted it too. I had so many dreams for myself and I feel like I should just toss them into the trash.

I was working at Lambert's Coffee and it was not working out.... not enough hours, not enough respect.

Now I have an even more god awful job working at a water pump company.... doing data entry.... the only upside is that I get paid very well. Which is great. I can save up money and move away.

I should be thankful that my mom and stepdad let me live under their roof but I feel like they just want me to have a job whether I am happy or not.

It sucks a lot and I feel like there is this huge hole in my heart. I did not even want this job at the water pump company. I get confused everyday and people get tired of me messing up and asking a lot of questions. Oh well.

I sit at work and I think of how lucky some people are. They have the job they always dreamed of. I feel like for some people it comes so easy. I know there are people who work extremely hard to get where they are today. I totally respect that.

I need guidance. I have none. I do not even know where to start or how to find a job doing what I want to. I don't have the most impressive resume but I do have some internships.

I don't know. I apologize for the emo blog. I am just really upset, stressed, and tired. It's such a busy week with my mom and stepdad being out of town.

Update- 3/6/12
I was let go at the Water Pump Company because I was asking too many questions and I was clocking in too early(apparently you can get in trouble for that) and was late 1 day but whatever. I can't help my first week I was hardly trained then the second week my boss was on vacation and I was left with no clue. They were so rude to me. I did not care. The joys of temp jobs.